Friday, April 30, 2004: Hazy Shade of Mullet
I stumbled across some retro-80’s video spot on V and subjected Sandy to some really bad fashion stylings. First we watched Michael Jackson’s “Billy Jean” which I found more strange than amusing. This some-what tame low budget looking video was such a huge hit and I clearly recall how it was hailed as some sort of breakthrough in music video making. What I found odd was the story line of the video being about Mikey getting followed around by a nosey reporter who’s trying to catch Mr. Pre-Surgery Jackson “in the act”…
Sort of prophetic in a way, isn’t in? As for Michael Jackson’s face…
Remember the Bangles “Hazy Shade of Winter”? Oh I bet you do now. And I bet it will take a lot more than “The Ketchup Song” to pry that out of your skull now that I have reminded you of it. I had forgotten it completely but the laugh I got out of the video makes up for having that song stuck in my head once again. After a few minutes of observing The Bangles in their pooched-out 80’s glory Sandy asked me, “You want me look same?”
Ah, no.
The Men Without Hat’s “Safety Dance” made Sandy laugh pretty hard. She was baffled at how anything so “Bah” could have been such a big hit. The video ranked pretty high on the mulletude factor and I’d forgotten about the mandolin playing midget. I now have a new silly dance to do around the Redoubt for Sandy’s… amusement.
Thursday, April 29, 2004: The BBC Blows
Sandy and I stayed up late watching the Thai news coverage of the events in the south. This was truly educational, especially after watching the BBC’s absolutely incorrect report on what happened. According to the BBC the insurgents were only armed with knives and the high number of casualties was due to a “heavy handed” response by the Thai Police and Army. The footage they showed was of Thai troops running about, helicopters flying over head, and dead insurgents armed only with knives. At the end of the report the correspondent went on in a concerned voice about “questions being asked as to how there could be such a high death toll”. The whole thing sounded as if the Thai Buddhist had started it.
The Thai news report broke down events and their locations in detail. There were ten different incidents in ten different locations. This began at 4:00 am and went on until 2 pm in the afternoon. You could clearly see on the Thai news the dead insurgents laying beside not just knifes or machetes, but M-1 rifles, shotguns and weapons stolen from the Police. The grouping of the dead also indicated they’d been charging where ever they were attacking en masse either by foot or on motor bikes. One dead guy had a grenade launcher. The BBC didn’t bother showing the footage of the wounded cops being off-loaded from the back of a pick up truck and taken into a hospital, nor did they show the Thai footage of the Thai Policemen and Soldiers in a running gun battle with insurgents and taking shelter behind some cars. The BBC did mention the final battle was at this ancient Mosque where 32 of the insurgents had “taken refuge”. No mention that they’d actually taken over that Mosque at 5:00 am during morning prayers, kicked everyone out except for 3 people they took as hostages and then blared their intention to carry out the Jihad over the Mosque loud speakers for 20 minutes. Apparently in this speech they urged the locals to join them, and did not mention separatism once. It was from this Mosque that the groups of fighters headed out to their various objectives and it was used as a sort of head quarters. No criticism for them taking over but plenty of criticism for the way they were removed.
If the BBC’s reporting on this is so oddly biased and incorrect how can I believe ANYTHING they report? I must say the Thai footage was excellent and reminded me a lot of how the Oka crisis was covered in Canada. It was video-taped as events unfolded. It was certainly not sanitized. The Thai government is clearly afraid of scaring off tourists. Between SARS and The Chicken Flu tourism hasn't been what is was here.
Wednesday, April 28, 2004: Rain, Gilligan and Jihads
This morning there was the most unbelievable thunder and lightening storm. It has been really hot as of late and the humidity has been building up over the last week. It was quite the downpour. The thunder was continuous and occurred every two or three seconds. These were big deep booms from God’s giant Roland 808 bass drum that shook the Redoubt and eventually woke Sandy up.
It rained heavily all morning but by noon it had pretty much stopped. As much as I do love hot season I was quite the relief to walk around this afternoon in cooler feeling air. The rain dropped the temperature down 10 degrees to 32 C, and with the lack of humidity it felt down right cold.
I had some really screwed up dreams last night. For example, what could THIS mean? In one dream I entered a room and found Gilligan and the Skipper sitting on a bed surrounded with teddy bears and stuffed toys. Gilligan was singing the theme to the TVO Cartoon “Simon in the Land of Chalk Drawing” (Pronounced DRAWERING). The Skipper looked none too pleased but seemed to have no choice in the proceedings. If you have any suggestions as to what this might mean please email me.
I watched the big shoot out in the South in the gym (only and martyr would bring a machette to a gun fight). A bunch of Jihadists went on a rampage in the south attacking Police Stations and the like. It was weird to watch it on the BBC as its being simultaneously shown on a Thai news show. The BBC didn’t show too much. The Thai’s are pretty full on with their showing of death and destruction on TV. There were plenty of dead Islamaholics sporting that special green colour they use for their Jihad flags. The BBC reporter went on about how the Muslims in the south feel they are discriminated against. I guess not being allowed to burn down government schools, kill teachers and hack Buddhist monks to death really puts a damper on their party. In any event 5 or 6 coppers got killed and something like 107 militants.
The Thai Government of course continues its policy of sticking its collective head in the sand on this just like they did with SARS, the Chicken Dance Flu and all the rifles that were stolen back in the beginning of the year. They are claiming that the militants had no outside help from any terrorist organizations and that they were all “drug addicts”. That of course is ridiculous. The ramble-rousers who have helped spread this Jihad here are NOT Thai by any means. Sooner or later something will happen here in Bangkok and the Thai’s will have to face the truth of what’s going on. (And I’ll feel like I’m back in Manila!)
Tuesday, April 27, 2004: Beside Companion
Last week I received a special care package. It came from the Original Paris Chiasson and contained three mix tapes. The first of these tapes was almost exclusively made up of Nash the Slash instrumentals. Side A contained all of “Dreams and Nightmares”, as well as some of the original Nash EP “Bedside Companion”. Side B contained the rest of “Bedside Companion” as well as all of the “Decomposing” EP. As a coda Paris threw in some tracks by the band “FM” which Nash was a member of during the 70’s as well as some Wendy Carlos Moogisms from back when Wendy was Walter and Bach was first “Switched on”.
Maybe in the way that one always sees their first love as they saw them in their youth Nash’s late 70’s tunes sound just as thick and juicy to me now as they did when I was 14. Perhaps it’s the analog gear Nash was using, or maybe it is the fact that Paris dubbed it from vinyl, complete with all those pops and clicks. Which ever the case, it was pure joy to listen to it again. The burbling Roland drum machine, the heavily filtered electric violin, and the super distorted electric mandolin bring back all sorts of happy memories of my bumbling awkward youth. I fell asleep listening to it while lying in the sun beside the pool and drifted in and out of dreams about riding bikes and going to the Ontario Science Centre. When I think of Nash I must admit I think of being in Grade 9.
Oddly “Decomposing” doesn’t invoke any sort of memories as I only picked up an old vinyl copy some time in the mid-90s. I never listened to it enough for it to make its mark except however for one song called “Womble” which I dubbed onto one of two “Ultimate Vinyl Mix Tapes” before I came to Asia in 2000. “Womble” would now be considered drum and bass or some such electronica (how many sleazy record company weasels did it take to come up with that name?) style, but when it was done it was unusual beyond words. It’s complete drum machine freak out the likes of which no one had dared before. “Womble” for me now makes me think of one place; Laos. In fact I’d say it makes me think of Laos more than anything else does.
Thursday, April 22, 2004: Pantip Melts My Brain
I wandered around Pantip Plaza looking for a specific piece of software today. I never found it. On the way back down the street though I discovered a music store which must be new, and never open on Sunday (when I usually brave Pantip). The music store is the only place in Bangkok that seems to sell Roland gear. New Roland gear. Not used old crap. Besides having every piece of Roland gear I want (need!) they had a good supply of USB audio interface gear including some nice USB keyboards that feature built in audio interfaces.
Very nice.
It is definately summer now. Hot, sunny and summerish. HOT. I like it. Walking about today was wonderful. Getting into A/C was also wonderful.
Monday, April 19, 2004: Song Kran 2547
Last week was Song Kran, the traditional Buddhist Lunar New Year festival. This of course involves a great deal of water throwing, paste smearing and in the case of the Thais excessive drinking resulting in highway deaths. This year’s death count was 512 over the week. I’m not sure how that compares to Victory Day Weekend in Ontario. Not all the deaths are related to motor vehicles, and not all the motor vehicles accidents are related to alcohol. I’m sure some of those deaths had something to do with people throwing buckets of water at motorcycles as they sped past them. Just a theory.
Tuesday the plan had been for a group of us to go to Kho San Road to hose down the hippies, but that sort of fell apart when some people couldn’t eat their breakfast quickly enough and the taxi driver Sandy and I had got separated from the other taxis and so on. In the end Sandy and I became the lost patrol, searching in vain for the others. After a few hours of this we hopped in a tuk tuk and headed back to the Redoubt. That was actually the highlight of the day since I got to blast people with the Teddy Bear as we passed by them.
Wednesday I met up with Bonhomme and found myself in a stationary position dousing those who past by our spot. This was a lot of fun, especially since we were in front of a bar owned by a friend of Bonhomme’s girlfriend. We had a hose to supply us with water and better yet a truck full of bags of ice right next to us. The Teddy Bear backpack water gun that I used with such great effect last year began to malfunction towards the end of the day, which was too bad. Still it served me well for two Song Krans.
Monday, April 12, 2004: Easter Weekend in Phnom Penh
I spent the Easter weekend in Phnom Penh. I was sort of hard to believe that six months had passed since I was last there. Bonhomme and I flew in Friday night and stayed at the same place we were at last time. I don’t think getting a hotel in Phnom Penh is much of a problem even during holidays. After we’d sorted out our rooms we headed to FCC for some dinner. When we got there I was unnerved by the sudden realization that I was in a place full of Farang. It was the whitest people I’ve been in the same place as since 2002 and it felt really weird.
After we ate we grabbed some motorcycle taxis and went to check out a few different bars. One was this tiny little place on the second or third floor of what looked like a bombed out building. The main entrance to the building had what looked liked battle damage around the door, and the walls along the stair well were all scared up as if some one had tossed a few grenades into the place. The bar was marked by a photocopied sign on a piece of A4 paper scotch taped to the wall. Afterwards we explored down the hallway away from the stairs just out of curiosity. There was a limit as to how far down we could walk though, just out of the sheer creepiness of the place. The hallway was barely lit, and filthy. Outside of some Hollywood art directors imagination I don’t think I’ve ever seen a spookier place.
Next stop was a larger beer garden type bar. It had A LOT of people, some pool tables, a disco at one end and an open air beer garden at the far end. The beer garden featured a live band that provided real time karaoke for the drunk and the brave. That was the best entertainment as it was just so awful. One thing I noticed about the place, besides the over abundance of mullets, was that Bonhomme and I were probably the youngest Farang in the place. The rest seemed to be just the riff raff typical of South East Asia and of course all the dodgy-dealers who have been recently chased out of Bangkok. It was truly weird to witness.
On Saturday we went to S-21 which was the High School the Khmer Rogue used to “process” political prisoners and “enemies of the people”. Between 1975 and when the Khmer Rogue finally fell in 1979 over 17,000 people, men, women and children were detained, tortured and either killed there or transported to the killing fields outside of Phnom Penh. The Prison has been turned into a museum and monument to those who were processed. There are several rooms filled with the passport type photos the Khmer Rogue took of each prisoner. I found the photos far more disturbing than the piles of skulls on display at the Choeung Ek killing fields. Skulls are faceless and anonymous. The photos are not. Face after face staring out blankly. Some clearly unaware of what is about to happen, others very aware and terrified. Looking at the faces of the kids was the most upsetting. (I will be posting my photos of the Tuoi Sleng Museum on the images pages over the next few weeks.)
We got back to Bangkok Sunday afternoon. It was noticeably hotter and I was suddenly dealing with the typical uncooperative taxi non-sense that defines how difficult it can be to do anything here. One great thing about the Khmer in Phnom Penh is how they welcome foreigners. However, I could live without the old toothless Khmer hags in rags coming up to me on the street saying “yum-yum, yum-yum”.
I also had the scary experience of riding a Bangkok motorcycle taxi after having been on Phnom Penh motorcycle taxis for two days. Where as the Khmer drivers roll along at a leisurely speed of maybe 30 kph I was suddenly on the back of Evil Knievel’s bike racing up towards Sukumvit at twice the posted speed limit.
Friday, April 9, 2004: NO Wheel Chair Access
Here's an unfortunate sight to see. Some poor Farang guy in a wheel chair rolling along down Ratchathewi looking for a way to get on to the sidewalk. Not that being on the sidewalk would be an improvement over the road. You're only slightly less likely to get run over and the sidewalks in Bangkok are sort of a challenge to walk on. I was heading back to the Redoubt and there he was rolling along, probably wishing he had one of those gyro-balanced seguey things that can climb staircases.
Wheel chair access??? Who's ever heard of that here? If you need a wheel chair to get around chances are you couldn't afford one so you'd be hobbling along on crutches anyways. The notion of making the sidewalks accessable to the handicapped... Now that's forwards thinking. They haven't even figured out how to make the sidewalks accessable to those who can walk.
Another mystery to me these days is the sudden appearance of Farangs on mountain bikes. I'm not sure if this is a new fad of 'biking around the world" or if someone local is renting them out. Which ever the case these idiots are more of a danger than the motorcycle guys. At lease the moto boys KNOW how to drive on the sidewalk. These clowns just pose a threat to themselves and others.
Anyways, I'm not sure what happened to Wheels but I hope he found his way okay.
Me? I gotta plane to catch. Back Monday. Cheers.
Thursday, April 8, 2004: Travel Advisory: Dumb all Over
It's hot. I like that.
I'm running again. I took a week off as my right leg wasn't working so good. I have 4 old injuries (broke a bone in my foot, smashed my shin, screwed up my knee and something else) that all decided to act up at once so I decided to take it easy for a bit. I think I may have been increasing my speed too quickly.
Israelis advised not to travel to Thailand. Thai police warn of a five-motorbike bomb threat by Muslim extremists. Thai Stockholm embassy warned anonymously building will be blasted unless Thai troops withdrawn from Iraq.
I hope nothing comes of this. I'm so tired of these dopes and their self-rightous stupidity. Yeah, I'm only a Kuffar and I eat pig meat but that doesn't give them the right to blow me up. No matter what their good book says.
On the lighter side, I had a motor cycle taxi driver last night who hadn't brushed his teeth for so long that I was getting bad-breath-back-draft from him. Truly frightening.
Wednesday, April 7, 2004: Massive Attack verses Record Weenies
The recording industry is blaming file swapping and the downloading of MP3’s for the drop in CD sales over the last 5 years. This is sort of like Ford Motor Company in the late 1970’s blaming hitch-hiking for a drop in its sales when real reason is lack of quality. How is it that the music industry hasn’t figured out that making a crap product isn’t the way to win over consumers? There has been little of interest going on since 1999 and that’s why I think the sales are down. Every time music sales drop though the music industry starts whining. In the early 80’s it was video games to blame. Then in the early 90’s it was “blank cassettes”.
In Canada the Recording Weenies Syndicate and SOCAN (of which I am a member) spent almost all the 90’s pushing this levy (tax) on blank media through Parliament. That means every time you buy a blank CD or cassette in Canada 5 cents or something goes to the record companies to recoup their “losses”. While this was being pushed through MP3s came along and surprised them. Now the same tax has come back to bite them on the ass. A Federal court has denied the Recording guys the right to sue file swappers because they are ALREADY being compensated for losses by the blank media tax.
It would also seem that my theory on quality not swapping might be correct. No one seems to be willing to come out and say it though. Sony Music will pour millions of bucks in to flop after flop album from the likes of Michael Jackson then they complain about business being poor. Perhaps if they stopped trying to push prefabricated pitch-corrected singing and dancing barbie and ken dolls and supported some actual musicians things might change.
In the mean time, while we're waiting for the next Curt Cobain I'm going to listen to Massive Attack's Mezzanine. I picked up another copy on the weekend (my original is in Toronto) and listened to it for the first time since 1999 last night. Wow.
Monday, April 5, 2004: Kho San Road
It’s definitely hot season now. Yesterday it threatened to rain all morning but never did, or at least not near us. There was a big black patch of sky that rumbled Nash the Slash style thunder while the rest of the sky was blue and sunny. Weather like that reminds me so much of being a kid in Halifax, or a teenager in Toronto during the summer.
One of Sandy’s friends from school had some photos showing at a cafe near Kho San Road so we wandered over there Sunday afternoon. We took the khlong boat down which was interesting since I haven’t gone on the khlong boat since the dodgy cop incident and I haven’t gone in the direction of Kho San since 2001. It was a good trip down and we caught a tuk tuk from the last stop to Kho San. We had to wander around a bit in order to find the place where the photos were showing.
The café they were in was a small place with two floors. The photo display was titled “Mood of Motion” a phrase which Sandy wanted an explanation of. When I said that I thought it meant “the feeling of movement”, she responded by saying “make feel like vomit”. I may have not done a good job of translation.
We ate there, and I had a so-so breakfast; scrambled eggs that were okay but not great. The place had a few back packer types in it. I’m always astounded by their choice of clothing; tissue paper thin pajama style outfits that look like the reason they don’t get washed is because that might cause them to dissolve.
After we had finished our brunch we walked around this park near the river. There was a Thai “rock” band playing and we stopped and watched them for a bit. I’m sort of baffled by the Thai rock thing. They seem to know how to dress “alternatively” and they can play but they seem forever trapped in covering the same songs. They play the most saccharine paff imaginable. Poppy pop pooh that totally conflicts with the rocker image they try and project.
Sandy and I walked from there to Kho San proper. I haven’t been on Kho San Road in the day time since 2001 so the difference was startling. What was once the haven for the back-packing alternative neo-hippies is now simply a tourist trap zone for the back-packing alternative neo-hippies. The entire casts of Jesus Christ Superstar as well as the heroes of Starlost were there. It was bizarre. I normally only see Farangs of the expat variety or back-packers in small numbers but this was a menagerie of weirdoes and “world traveler” types who’s alternative save the planet ethno-hip bongo beating reverberates through the halls of vegan eateries around the globe.
And despite their hemp trousers, Jesus sandals and filth are SO first world it’s frightening. Only some stupid rich kid from the first world would embrace a do nothing life style of hedonism, free love and narcotics. Only the selfish offspring of University Profs would wander around tripping on acid in a foreign land. And for all their anti-globalization anti-consumerism pitter patter one thing evident at Kho San is that these folk LOVE TO SHOP. The whole street is dedicated to selling them CD’s, t-shirts, shoes, sandals, clothes, tattoos, trinkets all at thrice the price you’d get at the weekend market or MBK.
You can wear your back packs, front packs, jammies, sandals and big Lonely Planet Buddhist attitude all you want but the truth is YOU ARE ON VACATION. YOU ARE ON VACATION AND NOT ON SOME PERSONAL JOURNEY OF SPIRITUAL ENLIGHTENMENT.
Anyways… Sandy bought a wrap-a-round skirt thing and I picked up a CD or two. We walked the Kho San strip and enough was enough. We took a taxi back to the Redoubt and settled in for an evening of domestic movie watching and snuggletude.
