Friday, July 30, 2004: Trim or Squash?

I’ve been back a few days now and I’m slowing getting used to walking on broken sidewalks and dodging motorcycle taxis on who would rather drive on those sidewalks than the street. It is nice to be able to get good food at more than reasonable prices.

Today was good. I had one of those workouts this morning that results in me feeling as if it’s the last day of school afterwards when I immerge into the morning sun. This isn’t to say I enjoyed running any more than usual or that the weights were some how lighter. It is just that after going through an hour and a half of that, no other task the day holds seems all that daunting. Plus there is whatever physical high the run and workout generate combined with walking into a sunny world full of fluffy clouds, green greenery and warmth.

This afternoon I happened upon a music store that I’ve never investigated. I checked it out to find it to be the most expensive music store in Thailand. 200,000 Baht for an electric guitar from a manufacturer that I’ve never heard of? Not likely. The staff was suspicious and unfriendly, and followed me around as if I was going to bust open one of the protective Plexiglas display cases with my head and run off with an overpriced guitar. They did have a surprising selection of Electro-Harmonics stomp-boxes including the pitch to voltage “mini-synth”, but again the prices seemed a bit much.

I also saw an old Boss DR-55 at a used instrument store. I could have picked it up as it was so cheap but after testing it I decided against it. It couldn’t make any sounds that my ER-1 or Groove Box can’t make, and programming it was a pain. The real deciding factor though was its lack of midi. Now that may not have stopped me from buying gear in the past but since most things will end up on the computer via the MRS-4 being able to sync to midi is suddenly important. I can trim loops in Sound Forge so they sync but what a time waster that can be. I’d rather spend that time squashing the file than trimming it.

Guess I’m getting lazy in my old age. I remember when I’d actually physically splice tape together to make tape loops and I even enjoyed doing it…

But that was 20 years ago.

Sunday, July 25, 2004: Home Again

Well I’m back. Home again home again jiggity jig…

The flight back was weird. I got to the airport HOURS early to avoid a repeat of Tuesday, checked in and wandered around the café zone of beyond customs and security. At 4:30 pm boarding began and off we went. The flight seemed to take forever, then when we finally began to descend I felt such relief knowing in a matter of minutes I’d be on my way home.

BUT… when we came out of the clouds I was confronted with the sight of islands. Weird shaped islands along a completely unfamiliar coastline. Then it hit me that this was a milk run to Phuket!

Before I could even be mad about this we flew into a rain storm and began bouncing around crazy. I really dislike Airbus planes. They rattle in the most frightening way. Boeings seem more solid some how, as if each one comes with a spare Chuck Heston in case things get out of hand. Airbuses are just plastic and cheap, and they shake with the smallest amount of turbulence.

Phuket! I was in Phuket for a whopping 45 minutes. I bought some post cards so you might get one. It had stopped whizzing rain but I was happy to be in the terminal with a hot tea in my hand. There were 2 Thai military transports parked outside the window as well as a RAF transport. There were also two small fighters of some type unknown to me. Unfortunately I didn’t bring Sandy’s camera with its massive telephoto lense with me on this trip.

We re-boarded then continued on to Bangkok. We rattled around most of the way there. Because we’d flown from Phuket we came down the Beatles staircase when we landed and had to get on buses to go to the domestic terminal. Then those of us who had come from Singapore had to get on another bus and go over to the other terminal so we could go through customs. Fortunately there was NO line up at all and I walked straight through and out to Kaboom.

Kaboom drove me back to the Redoubt. Sandy, Pooh and her boyfriend were at Co Co Walk eating but I didn’t feel up to joining them after the big flight. Instead, once I’d unpacked and so forth I slapped in disc one of “Eyes Wide Open” and enjoyed the show. They came back about an hour into it with drinks and some snacks, and chatted in Thai while I continued to watch. Occasionally they’d stop and glace over when something strange was going on but for the most part I think it was so far beyond anything they’d ever seen or heard they just paid it no mind.

Friday, July 23, 2004: Expensive?

I am getting used to being here. (Except for the price of food) I miss Sandy though. I broke down and bought the DVDs last night. I will have to wait until I get back to Bangkok to enjoy them though. In the mean time “Send” plays on my Playstation.

I am amazed at how busy it is here. When I came last year at this time there was NOBODY, due to the SARS scare. This year there are tons of tourists everywhere. I’ve looked at the price of digital cameras but I actually think they are cheaper in Bangkok. I’m not sure if computers are that much cheaper here either.

I’ll be back on the cracked and broken sidewalks soon enough.

Thursday, July 22, 2004: Class B

Wandering around this morning I found a small CD/DVD shop that had amongst its extensive selection of music DVDs two King Crimson DVDs; “Deja Vrooom” from 1995, and “Eyes Wide Open” from 2000 and 2003. I am debating whether to pick them up. They are both double DVDs in a way (Deja Vrooom has two "sides") and well, its King Crimson. Do I have a choice?

I have found a place on Orchard that makes outstanding food. It is called Pre Rouge and features a great patio for sitting and watching the world go by. Something I haven’t done much of in a long time. The only down side is I have forgotten how expensive it is to eat in the first world.

I picked my Passport back up from the Thai Embassy. Pick up hours are after 2:00 pm so I marched up, got my visitors pass and went in and got the passport. There wasn’t the queue madness this time around and I was in and out with in five minutes. The visa was there all nice and new, now I just have to continue the process when I get back.

Wednesday, July 21, 2004: Send

It was raining when I got woke up. The one hour difference in time between Singapore and Bangkok meant my waking up at my usual time of 7:00 am was transformed into 6:00 am. There was a breakfast buffet that I was entitled to from 7:00 am until 10:00 am so I went down for that once I could. It was so diabolical tasting though I stuck to toast with jam and tea. I had some time to kill until the Thai Embassy opened so I played some games on my Playstation then got ready at around 8:00 am. I wasn’t sure how long it would take to get to and since it was raining I took a taxi.

I arrived at around 8:45 am, so with half an hour before it opened and not wanting to stand outside in the drizzle I walked across to a café for a tea. Again, Singapore reminded me of Vancouver but that might have been partly the wet. By the time I walked back over to the Embassy the rain had stopped. There was a bit of a line up outside the gate and it was funny to watch the Singapore security guards imposing strict Singapore conduct on those who tried to jump the queue. Unfortunately they weren’t organizing the activities indoors.

They let us in small groups, searching any bags, and waving us over with a metal detector. I had to surrender the Singapore customs exit slip to the guard booth before I went into the embassy. Once inside the procedure was supposed to be that you filled out the visa application form, then take a queue number from the machine and wait your turn. No one seemed to follow this, everyone grabbed a queue number, filled out (or didn’t) their visa form and then lined up ignoring the order of queue numbers. I filled my form out (clear as mud) attached my photo and the forms from the lawyer then took my place in line. The line was a bugger’s muddle by this point.

Some French guy in front of me made the fatal error of talking too much to the woman behind the glass, giving her a long winded explanation of why he was after a one year class B visa and she suddenly demanded to see his bank book. He of course didn’t have that with him so he was forced to go back to his hotel and get it. He marched off in a huff, angry at the injustice of it all, but if he’d just kept his mouth shut he probably could have put in his forms straight away.

I asked for the one year but was only allowed to apply for the 3 month. The new procedure being that you get the 3 month visa, then your lawyer does some magic dance of forms and paper work (and money) to extend it to a full year. Whether this is the new rule everywhere or not was not made clear. In any event I paid the 85 $ Singapore, gave her my passport and paperwork, got a receipt and off I went. I collected the white customs slip from the guard and walked back down Orchard Road towards my hotel.

Of course I had to stop at HMV.

I wandered around looking for something worth buying, that I might not be able to find in Bangkok. I found a new (or recent) Wire CD called “Send” which came out in 2003. Wire is of course one of my favorite bands of all time. I picked it up and listened to it later on my Playstation. It’s excellent. More snarly than the mid to late 80’s Wire stuff, but clearly Wire. It will make for good music to run to.

Tuesday, July 20, 2004: Singapore

Kaboom picked me up from the Redoubt at 6:30 am. I thought this would be ample time to get to the airport and do what must be done before my 8:05 am flight. I was wrong.
We got there in plenty of time alright, but once inside I was confronted with it being busier than I’ve seen it in my three years of flying in and out of there. Endless slow moving ques at the check in counter, followed by endless ques out into the customs departure zone. Part of the problem was the Smurfs.

I am not sure who these clowns were, but there were a lot of them. They looked Caucasian enough, which leads to the possibility they were from Uzbekistan or some such place, but it is equally likely they were from California. They wore weird white outfits with blue sashes around their waists and blue sack like hats. The men all had huge beards. Where ever they were from the Thai customs officials clearly didn’t like something about them. I finally passed through customs at 8:00 am… five minutes before my flight was supposed to leave for Singapore. I still had to get to pass through a security check and then get to my gate. Amazingly I made it. But I was give lots of sour looks when I came on board. The flight was delayed but that had nothing to do with me.

Singapore is beautiful. Anyone from Vancouver who goes on and on about Vancouver being the most beautiful city in the world needs a flight to Singapore. I took a taxi in my hotel which is just across from where I stayed last summer when I came here. I checked in, got my key and lugged all my stuff up to my room. After I changed I headed out to walk around and see some sites I might have missed last year. I had an overly expensive meal in this area near what is a river, inlet or canal. It was an area more touristy than I’d usually go, but it was a nice view, and it was great to be able to sit outside and enjoy the day with a meal.

No plans for tonight, maybe a swim, tomorrow I will go to the Thai Embassy.

Sunday, July 18, 2004: I, Electric People Bah

I started reading Asimov when I was about 11 years old on the advice of my childhood friend Jeff Longard. “I, Robot” was actually the first Asimov book I read, and I continued to read Isaac Asimov’s works through into my teen years, including the original three “Foundation” books.

When I started to see advertisements a while back for Wil Smith in a movie adaptation of “I, Robot” I was sort of baffled. How could you make an action movie out of a book that chronicles 200 years of robotic development through a series of short stories? That awful “Bicentenial Man” is actually closer to “I, Robot” the book, than “I, Robot” the movie. Fortunately where “Bicentenial Man” sucks, “I, Robot” the movie is REALLY good, even though the only similarity between the book and the movie is the 3 laws of robotics, and some characters’ names.

It’s not “Blade Runner” but it’s definitely better than “Minority Report”, and it also happens to be the first sci-fi fantasy type film in several years that I actually enjoyed (opposed to sort of enjoying). I did enjoy it way more than “Spider-Man 2”. Perhaps it is time for a 10 year moratorium on making movies about comic book characters.

Please.

Bonhomme’s girlfriend didn’t like though. Her review was “electric people bah” (“bah” is Thai slang for “crazy”)

Friday, July 16, 2004: Squashed Like A Bug

I received a special package today from Brengun. She found a copy of the Slurp CD “Classic Rock” in a bargain bin somewhere and picked it up for me.

OH, JOY…

Upon cracking the thing open I noticed on the liner notes the following…

“This album was recorded and produced by SLURP in 1994…”

Ten years ago!!! Then it occurred to me that it was exactly ten years ago that The Original Chris Chiasson and I spent time rehearsing with SLURP for live shows that never happened. TEN YEARS… In a way it seems less in other ways it seems like something that happened to someone else…

Anyways, listening to brought back some fine memories of sitting on the second floor balcony on those hot summer evenings, drinking Billy’s Gone Out home made wine, and waiting for Secret Agent Girl to call. That was an outstanding summer actually. J Jonah Smallbridge would come by in the diesel weasel and we’d make outrageous non-sense under the moniker “Johnny Camero & The 8-track Orchestra” (with such songs as “Wide Leg Stake-Out”, “The Shag Carpet Song” and “Roller Rink Love Hunk” why didn’t we take this further?), then go to Big Slice or if it was late-late take a drive to an all night diner.

Be glad I don’t have access to my journals from that time, as I would subject you them. Perhaps some day I will.

Wednesday, July 14, 2004: Boogies and Visas

I’ve got a headache (and it’s not a tumor).

Sorry I haven’t been posting. I’ve been preoccupied by two things; sickness and visas. Sandy was ill last week with the sniffles and such like, which she passed along to me and rendered me useless on the weekend. Now she’s better but I am still only running at 70 percent. Not that I ever get much above 85 percent but that’s another story. (Thanks Hammy)

This bout of sickness has introduced a new English word into Sandy's vocabulary. She must have heard me use the word and she started using it. At first I wasn't actually sure what she was talking about.

"Pookies? What are Pookies? My dye."

"Pookies, pookies!" Pointing at my nose.

Oh BOOGIES!!!

Don't worry she laughs at my attempts at Thai. (Except for the words Kaboom teaches me)

The other real mind snapper this week has been the issue of VISAS!!! One of the main occupations of Expats here in the Land of Smiles is speculation on changes in policy regarding visas. No one really knows the truth, but everyone is sure that this or that is about to happen.

Now for the last year I’ve been running on my visa on entry tourist visa, which means every 30 days I’m required to leave and then return. Leaving and returning on the same day is fine and is what I’ve been doing by going to Poipet. However word on the street has been that as of July 10, 2004 you are only allowed to have 3 tourist visas in one year. As I already have 6 that might present a slight problem. The last thing I want to run into here is a slight problem; especially at the border. With that in mind, and using various contacts and so forth I have set out to get my one year “class B non-immigrant” visa. I should have done this last summer but…

In the end the Lawyer discounted the notion that as a Canuck I would get hassled at the border and didn’t think this new rule applied to those of us who get “visa on arrival” only to those nationalities who have to apply to get a tourist visa. Still getting the class B is the best bet despite the bother it entails as once I have it I will only have to go out of country once every 3 months. Hopefully when this is all done I will never have to go to Poipet again.

Friday, July 9, 2004: On Back Sliding

It occurred to me that when I had what I believed in taken from me it changed me. It wasn't that I could no longer believe in anything, it was that I no longer knew what to believe.

Thursday, July 8, 2004: Quick Silver

Last night the awful 80’s movie “Quick Silver” was on TV. This movie is possibly one of the worst 1980’s movies and is so clichéd that it is an absolute must watch (with a cringe factor of 98 %). Kevin Bacon plays “Smilin' Jack Casey”, a successful “stockbroker” with an awful 80’s business mullet and gay porn mustache who loses everything (including his parents' life savings) in just one day. The busted out Jack gets out of the business, shaves off the stupid mustache, grows a full on super-mullet, dawns a red beret and starts working a bicycle messenger.

This movie is so full of 80’isms that watching it was almost traumatic like the sound of a helicopter might be to a Vietnam vet. I remember the trailers for this but I never actually watched it until last night.

What does an 80’s movie really need you ask?

1) Stock Market action. Not that it has to make any sense or have anything to do with reality. In fact Smilin’ Jack looks to be doing the job of a floor trader not a broker but who cares? What’s important is that there are lots of guys yelling, trading slips of paper and making secret hand signals. When was the last time that Hollywood cast the leading character in a movie as a Stock Broker? (Boiler Room doesn’t count)

2) A Dancer. It’s the 80’s so Smilin’ Jack’s girl friend has to be a Flash Dance type dancer, prancing around in their warehouse loft in her ballet tights and leg warmers to music that no one in their right mind would actually purchase. Not in the 80’s, not in any decade. (See item # 5) Even the bike couriers get in on the action by having a Fame type impromptu dance off with lots of tricky bike tricks on the street. (Perhaps a dark foreshadowing of the horrible “extreme craze” we were subjected to in the early 90’s)

3) Bit Part by Now Famous Actor. No 80’s movie is complete with out the chance to say “hey, look it’s __________ from __________! In Quick Silver’s case it’s Laurence Fishburne. A thinner Morpheus plays the role of the “bad” bike courier named “Voodoo”, who moves illegal packages for fast money and who oddly looks like he should be detained in Guantanamo Bay. Fortunately Fishburne’s acting career has survived better than his character in Quick Silver.

4) Really Awful Clothes. Your mind blocks these clothes out after the decade ends. You remember the obvious fashion atrocities like shoulder pads, turtle shell yuppie glasses, and leg warmers but you forget about the little things. Those ugly pink trousers or the goofy looking elf boots that women tucked their ugly trousers into. And the head bands. Everyone had a head band of some sort. Brrrrr.

5) Crap Sound Track. Sound Tracks in the 80’s really sucked. The only exception to this rule that I can think of would be Wim Wenders “Wings of Desire”. The rest though were just awful. They feature special songs by forgotten “Stars” written for the movie that contain the words “heat” and “night” and “hold on” and “fire”. These songs will suck. They will convey the notion of someone trying to reach some goal in the heat of the city against the odds with by the power of the 80’s cliché guitar sound. This is music that will either make you want to put on your head band, jump in your Jeep with a role bar, drive down main street wearing shorts and a sleeveless “wife beater” t-shirt, pumping your fist in the air… or cover your ears and hope it will be 1993 soon.

Maybe the reason I watched it (besides the fact I got to laugh at it) was that it reminded me of how Mark Lesiak, the drummer from Wisehammer used to pull his nose back with his thumb then run around in circles doing this weird Footloose thing yelling “I’m Kevin Bacon! I’m Kevin Bacon!”

Wednesday, July 7, 2004: Redoubt Rearranged

Sandy decided it would be really great to completely rearrange everything in the Redoubt. Well, almost everything. (Enough of it to confuse me in the dark) I came in looking forward to a snooze, but had to help move stuff around for half an hour. Eventually I cleared part of the bed off and fell asleep.

The two last original fish have finally died off. One went on Monday night, and another died this morning. But thanks to Sandy's trip to the weekend market we have 15 new fish to feed.

Sunday, July 4, 2004: Spider-Man Too?

Sandy went to the weekend market with the Penguin Lady at around 11:00 am. I went over to QNA’s new apartment and brought a teeny tiny cactus. We hung about, drank tea and then decided to go see Spider-Man 2 at the Emporium. We bought tickets for the 4:30 pm show then had an hour to kill. Book store, CD Warehouse, Sony Store… Then the most fly infested Starbucks in Bangkok for some coffee (don’t mind the flies we won’t weigh them). Finally it was time and off we went.

Now, I’m not a big authority on comic books, despite my PHD in nerdishness. When I was a kid I liked Iron Man, but my main comics of choice were SGT Rock, The Losers, Haunted Tank and a brilliantly demented thing called Plop. My knowledge of Spider-Man was limited to the crapulently animated cartoon that we all know the theme to. I must say one thing LACKING in the Spider-Man movies is that ever present line from the cartoon that Peter Parker would spout every episode as he was trapped under something or somehow over powered.

“Can’t breathe… Can't think... Gotta get... Out of here…” (This was once an absolute catch-phrase amongst the Wisehammer brethren)

Anyways Spider-Man 2 was good. I can’t really give the same clear headed review I would have a few years ago due to some kind of PTSD side effect that has pretty much robbed me of my interest in such movies. I can say it was better than any of the Matrix sequels. Then my Brothers wedding video from 1981 is better than any of the Matrix sequels so perhaps that isn’t a fair comparison. I can’t compare it to Lawnmower Man 2 because I never saw that. The computer effects certainly were better than Lawnmower Man. It was good I guess. Octo-Guy looked good. There was far too much chick-flick stuff in it. Less of that and more of J. Jonah Jameson would be a suggestion for Spider-Man 3.

But it was worth the 140 baht. (That’s about 5 bucks Canadian. Ha. HA HA HA. How much is there now, 12 bucks for a ticket and 9 dollars for a popcorn and a drink?)

After our Spidey senses had been sufficiently tingled, we were hungry and went to the Dubliner for Sunday roast. Only there was no roast left so QNA had some weird sausage, cabbage, onions and mash (gas anyone) affair, and I had a beef & Guinness pie which later gave me brutal gut rot.

Sandy bought LOTS of fish. I’m not even sure how many we have now. Lots. Little tiny ones, some thin ones and some medium size ones. One of the three surviving fish has been less than energetic so I suspect he will be leaving us soon.

Saturday, July 3, 2004: The Rules of Engagement

Sandy says I'm not allowed to bite her because I have "many teeth". She however is allowed bite me because her teeth "are only small" therefore only hurt "a little bit".

Friday, July 2, 2004: A Bell is a Horse Head

Yesterday I came back to the Redoubt and found Sandy cleaning to "A Bell is a Cup". Maybe it's the 80's production values.

We had some wanton soup (not that pathetic crap you get from Chinese restaurants in North America) for supper, then after watched the thinner Saddam get charged for being a dickweed dictator. The BBC described him as being "defiant" but I think "in denial" would be a better description. His main argument in his defense seemed to be "I'm the president". Still the fact he is anti-American will certainly get him a lot of sympathy from various camps. Never mind that whole gassing the Kurds thing or his invading Kuwait so he wouldn't have to pay back the money he borrowed from them for that war with Iran.

We watched "51st State" and enjoyed that except for the annoying skipping the DVD did. I actually think I like VCD's better as they seem to be less prone to skipping. Maybe because they don't have all that menu business. The movie lacked Thai subtitles unfortunately and that limited Sandy's enjoyment. She can understand English but she can't understand THE English.

Today (so far) consisted of Currahee, coffee time, a trip to the best currency exchange in Thailand, a pepper steak and of course the usual this and that plus a visit to Strongbadia.

Thursday, July 1, 2004: Canada Day

It is nice to spend Canada Day in a place where I don't have to pay 15% sales taxes or ponder how 54 of the country's parliamentary seats are occupied by fellows who want to leave the country. (Not that anyone would actually miss them) Yes it was wonderful to wake up at the Redoubt all snugglified and comfy.

That's ALL I have to say about that. No plans this year for official events, spicy drinks or confrontations with dive instructors.

Sandy was out until about 9:00 pm last night with her sister. Many fellows in Bangkok would use such a window of opportunity to race to Nana or Soi Cowboy, I however (no doubt having some incredibly big personality disorder) used the time alone to do music. More specifically to record vocals. This marks the first official and quite successful application of adding vocals to something created entirely on the computer, then transferred to the MRS-4. Once the tracks were finished I transferred them back to ol' Clunky and tweaked them in Sound Forge, then added them to the original Acid Pro track. It worked amazingly well and I am extremely pleased with the results.

Last night during a point of intimacy I switched on the CD player to discover Sandy had been listening to Wire's "A Bell is a Cup" during the day. I didn't switch it and the result was the surreal event of later falling asleep to it. Something I haven't done in those circumstances since about 1989. Odd to think of it but it's only now 15 years later that I can listen to that music without the hard associations it had for so long dragging me down. Perhaps time does heal all wounds. Or maybe a bell is a cup until it is struck.